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We Are Family

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Category:
Adoption blogging

157 posts in this category

The Worst Babysitter

...Not going out is not any kind of sacrifice, we are older parents who are more than contented with what family life has brought and we never feel that we are missing out in any way - in fact quite the opposite, I think we relish the laziness of quiet nights in and the opportunity to recover from our busy days. 

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Finding Me a Family

Not me; I have one. Rather some reflections on the series on Channel 4 that ran before Christmas and on a recent blog in the context of us receiving our first contact letter from one of our child’s siblings, because ultimately it might turn out to be “Finding My Family” for them, in the fullness of time.

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10 Missed Calls

Like many today I am somewhat attached to my smart phone and I have it within reach pretty much constantly. However I was recently away on holiday and just decided that I wanted a day without it so left it behind on a trip to the beach. I didn't miss it at all and in fact I barely gave it a thought throughout the day.

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​‘What ever makes you think your son is securely attached?'

‘What ever makes you think your son is securely attached?' The kind therapist said. 

I was puzzled.

‘Erm. I’m his mum and he reaches straight for me if he is upset...?! ...: Erm ... dunno. We are very close. We have a strong bond... I think... I just know.’

‘Ok. How long has he been with you?’

‘Three years.’

‘I’d be very surprised if he was securely attached. Most adopted kids are insecurely attached.’

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Unattached to school.

Our son has been kicked out of school. 

That is two and a half years of almost constant struggle (and endless meetings) with the school reduced to just one line.

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Our big adoption friendly / attachment aware school choice gamble.

Almost three years ago, we met our fabulous children and started family life together. While in the throes of building a family relationship and surviving instant parenting of a 1 & 3 year old, we were pressured by our children's social worker to select and apply for our daughters school place fairly early into our placement. Under time pressure, not knowing many local families with school aged children and being fairly emotionally exhausted, I will admit to doing fairly limited local research… visiting one school...

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The Diagnosis

It’s been one week since my son was diagnosed at St Thomas’ with ASD (Autism), ADHD, ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) and major emotional regulation difficulties.  He was diagnosed by a panel consisting of a Paediatrician, Psychologist, Psychiatrist, Speech and Language Therapist and Occupational Therapist who spent 3 hours assessing him.  They were thorough, professional and understanding.  

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Somebody Else's Child.

We have been given somebody else's child!

That fact is astonishing.

We have been given what has to be the most valuable gift one could ever receive, the gift of a human being - a life. 

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Daddies are bad.

Daddies are bad because they say the mushroom pool is closed for swimming because they want to go the heated warm one instead.

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