Category

Parenting

Parents need SUPPORT in order to ‘Parent Therapeutically’!

By Attachment, Becoming a family, Family, Parenting, Post adoption support, Trauma, We are Family No Comments

I want to ask you a question…

How does it FEEL, to parent a child who is quietly suffering!?

How does it FEEL, to parent a child who is hurting so bad, they flip into high octane expressiveness in a second?

How does it FEEL, to be with your child’s feelings, to be with such raw emotion – overt or covert?

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Being Older

By Family, Parenting No Comments

Adopting in my 50’s means that there is little doubt that I am an older (and the ‘er is me being kind to myself) parent.

Being an older parent has made me acutely aware of the negatives that age has wrought on my body, aware of every ache and every pain and aware of my inability to run and jump and play with my sons for long periods – as I would have been so capable of even a decade ago.

Yet –

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Sad Eyes

By Becoming a family, Family, Fostering, Identity, Parenting, Siblings, Trauma, We are Family No Comments

This week we stumbled upon a DVD that the boys brought with them when then first arrived that was filmed at a children’s play centre. It showed the pair of them sitting in a car seat ‘driving’ in front of a screen projecting moving cartoon images. We had watched it soon after they first arrived and it is sweet and charming and we thought it a lovely little peep at the younger – yet to be part of our world – them.

However, watching it again now is very different indeed, and what we see are two almost unrecognisable little boys

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ACE scores in the family

By Attachment, Becoming a family, Family, Identity, Parenting, Trauma, We are Family No Comments

Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) has far-reaching implications, including the surprising benefits of going through the healing process. 

The more I look at my parenting, the more I, and the way I was parented, stand in the way. Looking at the screen and my ACE score there is no other way of looking at it either. I have to look at my own roots. And deep down this really isn’t about me.

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Points of view: A two-pronged review of Gareth Marr/Scott Casson-Rennie and Hermione Michaud’s talks at Southwark Library on Wednesday 24th February 2016.

By Adoption assessment, Attachment, Education, Parenting, Placement, Post adoption support, Trauma No Comments

Hearing that We Are Family and the South London Adoption Consortium were running a presentation on “Why Children Placed From Care Need Support In Schools” was exciting news for me on multiple fronts. As a prospective adopter, I am trying to gather as much information as possible to help me prepare for life as an adoptive parent, but additionally, by day I work as a Deputy Headteacher at a London Primary School, and am always keen to learn more about how I can support vulnerable pupils at school.

So with two hats on, I felt like I was well placed to write a review (or two) of the evening. Thanks to We Are Family for giving me the chance to share my thoughts!

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