We Are Family recently attended the Adopter Reference Group meeting at the Department for Education, which focused on “Families in Crisis.” We presented our members’ experiences and feedback, highlighting the challenges they face and what support they need. Here are the main points we raised.
Key Themes
- Reactive Services Rather Than Proactive Support
Many parents feel that support for adoptive families is reactive, stepping in only once families are already in crisis. There’s little proactive outreach or ongoing support to prevent issues from escalating. - EHCP Battles and Challenges
Parents describe ongoing battles to secure Education, Health, and Care Plans (EHCPs) for their children. Many feel unsupported by local authorities, facing what can feel like intentional obstacles. As one member put it, “The coordinator within the local authority was deliberately unhelpful, whose sole purpose seems to be to obstruct the progression of [our] EHCP application.” - Parents Doing the Work
Many parents report feeling that they alone bear the burden of navigating the system to secure the right support. One member said, “I have had to do my own research and strongly advocate for myself and my family,” capturing the sense of struggle and persistence adoptive parents often experience. - Inconsistent Support Across Regions
Support varies widely across different schools, Local Authorities (LAs), Regional Adoption Agencies (RAAs), and Voluntary Adoption Agencies (VAAs). While some families report excellent support, others face significant gaps. This lack of consistency suggests there are better practices that could be applied more broadly: if some areas are getting it right, why can’t others? - Funding Inequities
Members highlighted the disparity in funding between children in care and adoptive families. One parent noted, “We had to battle constantly for support, yet as a result of not putting the right measures in place for us, our eldest now costs the government a significant amount of money every year.” Families are parenting children with high needs and difficult early life experiences, yet adoption is still too often seen as a “solution,” rather than a complex process that includes loss and trauma. As this parent pointed out, “This has to change.”
Positive Examples of Good Practice
Some members shared examples where they experienced effective support, showing what’s possible:
- Social Workers Attending School Meetings
In cases where social workers attend school meetings, they can help teachers understand attachment and trauma. This collaboration can make a real difference in how children are supported in the classroom. - Adoption Partnership South East (APSE)
One member highlighted APSE for its proactive approach to post-adoption support, noting how the agency regularly gathers feedback from adopters, panel members, social workers, and adopted young people to improve services. - Schools Supporting Children’s Unique Needs
In some cases, schools have gone above and beyond to support children’s specific needs. One member shared, “When his diagnoses came through (after 5 years of fighting for more support from social work etc.), they acted immediately, moved him into different ‘pathways,’ and allocated us a named SENDCO/nurture worker, who is outstanding. If it was not for the school, we would really be struggling.” - Trauma-Informed Transition to Secondary School
In cases where schools were prepared for students with trauma, parents noted positive results. One member reported that a Year 7 SENCO and TA took the time to talk with parents and listen to their concerns, showing trauma awareness and an understanding of adoption’s impact. - Simple but Effective School-Based Interventions
Some schools introduced straightforward interventions—yoga classes, Lego therapy groups, a consistent point of contact for the child, and a flexible approach to homework—that improved the school day and helped children feel more supported. One parent noted, “Excellent communication between home and school meant the child couldn’t ‘split’ adults, and we all stayed joined up.”
What More Could Be Done
Members also shared what they believe central and local government should be focusing on:
- Improved Adoption Support
Adoptive families need an approach centered around adoption-specific support, particularly when facing crisis. The “child in need” process isn’t always the right fit. Instead, adoption-focused resources should be available, especially at key transition points like starting primary or secondary school and entering puberty. - Streamlined Communication Across Agencies
Families want a smoother, more connected experience across agencies, with a sense of urgency to provide interim support if delays are unavoidable. - Right to EHCP Assessments for All Care-Experienced Children
All care-experienced children should have the automatic right to be assessed for an EHCP upon request. This would reduce the struggle for basic educational support. - Better Funding and Training
Local government needs to allocate sufficient funding to prevent delays in support services. Comprehensive training for teachers should also include adoption, fostering, and special guardianship, as well as better understanding of Pupil Premium funding.
Get Involved
We Are Family encourages members to continue sharing their experiences, as there are regular opportunities to provide feedback to the Department for Education, Local Authorities, RAAs, and VAAs. If you’d like to get involved, please contact Lisa at lisa@wearefamilyadoption.org.uk.
Together, we can help create a future where adoptive families receive the support they need.
