20 April 2018, by We Are Family (948 views)

I Hate You.

I was at a meeting with non adoptive parents and somebody brought up the fact that their child had screamed ‘I hate you' at them the day before and how hurt she had been by this, almost all of the other parents said that they had experienced the same and the group went on to discuss how difficult it is to hear and how hurt they had been.

Both our sons have indeed declared their hate for us in fits of anger - as well as the possibly more dramatic ‘you are not my parents anyway’, but neither my partner or I had been hurt or upset.

26 January 2018, by We Are Family (922 views)

Good Grief

...In our western world we are appallingly bad in dealing and talking about death, loss and grief. In any form, but death in particular. It's nothing to do with us. Until it is. And it will happen to us all. That much is certain...

05 October 2018, by We Are Family (895 views)

An Almost Mistake - Maybe

A recent weekend away with a friend's son threw up moral dilemmas that I was not expecting. How we parents have to interpret other families' norms, how our own standards clash with those of the culture we're parenting in, and how innocent assumption can lead us into treacherous territory.

04 May 2018, by We Are Family (876 views)

Get Real

'I thought these are your real parents, no?'

'So you are not real brother and sister then?'

I guess most adopters have experienced questions such as these being asked of us or our children at some point. It's frustrating to say the least and at worse it can feel insulting and indeed be quite painful, even so I am surprised at some adopters reaction to it.

25 January 2019, by We Are Family (851 views)

Rollercoaster

We were told that our adoptive lives would be a rollercoaster ride, weren't we? My day started on a dizzy high, and now I'm sitting here feeling like I've been turned inside out.

24 March 2017, by We Are Family (848 views)

My sons smell.

I am sorry to disappoint anybody who thinks this blog will be about teenage boys and their personal hygiene habits - or rather the lack of.

27 April 2018, by We Are Family (846 views)

Growing up.

I left my nearly 10 year old daughter at home, on her own, for the first time last week.

I knew she was tired and that a 10 minute walk to collect her sister from a local playdate would be met with moaning and groaning, so I gave her the option of staying at home whilst I popped out...

07 July 2017, by We Are Family (841 views)

Not in front of the children.

We were getting to the end of our assessment and panel was rapidly approaching, it had been long, intense and surprisingly emotional. We had a great social worker who we felt we got along with very well and who we found to be professional and very capable.

11 January 2019, by We Are Family (828 views)

The Never-Ending Family

Since we first read about our daughter, we’ve known that there were half siblings out there somewhere, in other adoptive families. This knowledge, which we had but she did not, has felt very heavy.