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There Is A Light Side

There’s been a thing going on, as there often is. The kid has decided that he’d like to use the opportunity of the topic ‘Who Am I?’ at school to discuss and display things from his birth family.

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Quiet

At first we were all chatting, sending funny memes and dark-tinted jokes. Then we started to count our blessings and revel in our new-found freedom. We quizzed, we zoomed, we house-partied. Then there was the dread of returning to a difficult normality, and the challenges of transitioning. And now, it is so quiet.

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Blast From The Past

I hope that some of the steps forward we’ve seen are permanent ones, for all of our sakes. We all get to the point when we have had enough of certain behaviours and battles, don’t we?

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A Journey to Parenthood #1

My partner and I discussed adopting fairly early on in our relationship and talked about how much we would like to do it. We are not religious but I guess we suffer from that middle class, privileged background angst that can drive you in a similar direction. Our adoption assessment was straightforward (our lives were labelled ‘perfect’) and we were matched quickly with our darling boy who was 1 at the time.

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No Normal, Thanks

Here’s where I am today, without any BS: I’m a rubbish mother, a rubbish teacher, a rubbish cleaner, a rubbish washerwoman, a rubbish therapist, a rubbish cook and a rubbish shopper. My ideas are rubbish, I look rubbish, I’m a rubbish partner and a rubbish human.

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Enforced Bonding

So, is this enforced isolation/ lock down or is it enforced bonding? I have been reflecting on the last few weeks, reminding myself of those 6-8 weeks four years ago when munchkin first came to live with me.

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Black Lives Matter: how am I driving?

Someone posted a question the other day, on how other adoptive parents were doing when it came to talking to their children about racism in the wake of the recent Black Lives Matter events. The post came on a morning when I (white adoptive mum) had kept my son aged 5 (black) off school, on and off the toilet trying to do a poo disimpaction regime resulting from all the lockdown carbs. I swept up another lump of poo, wiped his feet where he had trodden in it and thought, “We could do this topic today while he is off school, but you know, what with lockdown and now bowels and all the adoption stuff, it feels like our diary is full.”

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Home For The Holidays

After a great deal of thought, we decided we would have an Easter holiday this year. Not that we’re going anywhere, of course. Just that we’re taking a break from school work.

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Stuck In

We’re making an unscheduled visit to those early weeks of placement. The four of us chucked together (plus traumatised cat), seeing nobody else. Relying only on each other for our entertainment, love, emotional life, education, health… Getting to know one another.

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